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  #1  
Old 05 Apr 2011, 13:20
Boofo's Avatar
Boofo Boofo is offline
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Real name: Rob
Why you should never question a drunk

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected:

A quart of orange juice
A half gallon of 2% milk
A carton of eggs
A head of Romaine lettuce
A 2 lb. can of coffee and 1 lb. of bacon

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what? You're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."
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  #2  
Old 07 Apr 2011, 03:55
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BirdOPrey5 BirdOPrey5 is offline
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Real name: Joe D.
Originally Posted by Boofo View Post
A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected:

A quart of orange juice
A half gallon of 2% milk
A carton of eggs
A head of Romaine lettuce
A 2 lb. can of coffee and 1 lb. of bacon

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what? You're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."
One of my all time favorites.
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  #3  
Old 07 Apr 2011, 04:57
Reeve of shinra's Avatar
Reeve of shinra Reeve of shinra is offline
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Lmao!
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  #4  
Old 07 Apr 2011, 05:09
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HMBeaty HMBeaty is offline
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Real name: Brooks
LMAO! Definately wasn't what I was expecting.
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  #5  
Old 18 Apr 2011, 10:20
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JacquiiDesigns JacquiiDesigns is offline
 
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Location: Tennessee
Real name: Jacquii Cooke
yehehehehee!!!!!!!!!!!!! One of my favorite jokes
Always hilarious!
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  #6  
Old 20 Apr 2011, 03:00
sergiop sergiop is offline
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
I'm seriously laughing out loud at the moment. I though it would be something about drunks are not in their proper state of mind yata yata yata. But you crack this joke like hot potato. That's a good one.

On a more serious note, it would be a lot better to joke with someone who is drunk than to someone who just woke up. Both are not in the proper state of mind yet, but the drunk would not be able to run after you but the one who just woke up can, and he is fully recharged to do whatever it takes.
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  #7  
Old 16 May 2011, 12:55
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mrt12345 mrt12345 is offline
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
ok i just woke up and saw this....Hahahahahahahahah
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  #8  
Old 23 May 2011, 08:18
sergiop sergiop is offline
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
HA! I just read it again. "Cause your ugly!" - best comeback..
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  #9  
Old 23 May 2011, 09:18
Raeven Raeven is offline
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
In Gamer language: "Owend"
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